Ending Eleventh

Another school year is over. Hallelujah.

This has been an incredibly challenging year; seriously frustrating. Hope is really bright. There are some serious issues with executive function; there is an unwillingness to ask for help or even checking in for guidance. This is the trauma stuff and the ADHD stuff.

Then there’s the teen stuff where you’d just rather do other stuff that was far more entertaining.

Our county shows its schools to be very competitive nationally; I was always so proud to live in this county and was proud that the schools here are quite good, even the ones on the less affluent side of the county where we live. Well, there’s an unfortunate underbelly to our school system. When students who’ve done poorly all year even *modestly* trend upward in the final quarter the final grade will show as the lowest possible passing grade. This keeps the completion stats high and the course passage rates solid.

And this is how my daughter will pass two core classes without actually being proficient in the skills taught in those classes. I’m furious since we will go through yet another set of classes next year for which Hope is unprepared. Additionally, Hope has now 3 years of conditioning that her proficiency is better than it actually is. We are set up for the same frustrations for a 4th and final year.

I’m tired.

I’m tired of school.

I’m sure Hope is tired of school too. I know she is. She hates school.

I’m starting to hate her school too.

I’m hopeful that sending her to a summer academic program will help her develop some skills, but my expectations are low. I am more hopeful that she will learn how to engage with her teachers and classmates in positive ways. I am hopeful that she will learn how to try out a little independence in a safe environment.

She is a rising senior now. I’m looking forward to some of the milestones that come with this year. I’m wondering how many I should insist on so that memories and traditions are created and, in places, continued. I want her to enjoy finally being on top—being a senior has been important to her since 9th grade.

I want so much for Hope. I’m hoping that the gap between the amount of hopes and dreams Hope and I have is narrowed this year. I want her to dream big. My wish for Hope is that she will dream big, work hard and find her version of success. I don’t know what that will look like, not really for me to say or determine. That’s her journey.

For now, we’ve come through another year of school. It was hard fought, but we did it.

On to the senior year.

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About AdoptiveBlackMom

I'm a single Black professional woman living in the DC area. I adopted tween a few years ago, and this blog chronicles our journey. Feel free to contact me at adoptiveblackmom@gmail.com, on Facebook at Adoptive Black Mom, and on Twitter @adoptiveblkmom. ©www.AdoptiveBlackMom.com, 2013-2018. All rights reserved. (Don't copy my ish without credit!) View all posts by AdoptiveBlackMom

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