At 39 something deep inside clicked. Ok, that’s only sort of true. As I was approaching 40, I looked back over the last 20 years and thought those were some great times with lots of ups and downs. It’s been a great life, but it wasn’t the life I thought I would have. I thought I’d be married with a couple of kids and living the family dream. At 39, it dawned on me that the next 20 years could be more of the same–me with no family of my own. Despite this being a good life, I didn’t want to extend this version of a good life without a family. I wanted a kid, husband too, but he was more optional than the kid desire. So as I kicked off my 40th year, I decided to take the plunge into motherhood alone through the path of adoption.
So here I am a 49year old, professional black adoptive mom. These are my musings of the journey. The journey has potholes and smooth streets, but largely it’s an exciting, but emotionally draining time, littered with more life decisions than I ever dreamed could exist. So, I’m shoving those experiences here, to share with anyone who stumbles across them.
Feel free to contact me at email@example.com and follow me on Twitter @adoptiveblkmom.
August 18th, 2013 at 7:03 pm
Awesome. I have a similar story. I am a single mom by choice as well except I didn’t adopt. I went a different route. I just started a blog as well. Can’t wait to continue reading your posts.
August 18th, 2013 at 7:35 pm
Thanks so much, and can’t wait to read your blog! We might be on fraternal twin paths!
August 24th, 2013 at 4:45 am
So am I correct in stating that like myself, you are a single mom by choice? If so, I’d love to repost one of your articles on my page and get people talking about different options to parenting for choice mom.
August 24th, 2013 at 12:22 pm
Yes, that’s correct. I am a single mom by choice. I didn’t really think about it that way until someone called me *single mom* specifically early on in the process, as I mention in my first blog post. Please feel free to reblog my posts; I’d be interested in what people have to say! Thanks for the read.
August 26th, 2013 at 9:43 pm
[…] About. […]
January 8th, 2014 at 8:02 pm
I’m reading through your posts, and I can’t wait to see where this journey will go. I just started a blog about adoption stories. It will include stories from adoptees, adoptive parents, and anyone who has been connected by adoption. Feel free to stop by. http://thosefourlittlewords.com
January 8th, 2014 at 10:21 pm
Thanks for the read! I’ll definitely stop by and follow back. 🙂
October 21st, 2014 at 2:41 am
Thank you for following my blog 🙂 I can’t wait to read your work and probably share some of my own. I am curious to find out what it is for you being a single mum as I am also one and bump into all sorts of challenges here and there. Here’s to happy blogging!
October 21st, 2014 at 6:36 am
Thanks for the follow back. Yes, single motherhood! Definitely a special journey!
November 4th, 2014 at 5:28 pm
Just wanted to say thank you for your blog and podcast. I’m inspired by your story and looking forward to reading and hearing more!
November 4th, 2014 at 7:30 pm
Hey there Erica! Thanks for stopping by and reading! 🙂 Thanks so much for the encouragement.
January 20th, 2015 at 9:01 am
[…] Adoptive Black Mom […]
March 5th, 2015 at 5:42 pm
Hey! I have chosen your blog for the Liebster Award which is basically a blogger award that offers support within the writing community and encourages the discovery of new bloggers. You can find more information here along with the link I’ve shared for your blog. – http://treehugginghumanist.com/2015/03/05/for-further-reading/
July 31st, 2015 at 4:53 pm
[…] Breakdown My Kid Doesn’t Poop Rainbows Mama et Maman Counting Chickens AdoptiveBlackMom Impossibly […]
August 5th, 2015 at 3:00 am
Thank you for sharing. I have always known that I would adopt, it was just a matter of when. As I was approaching 40, divorced and childless I thought that it was a good season to adopt. Initially my ideal situation would include a husband and bio kids before adopting, but the marriage expired and bio kids never came. So here I am, the mother of a 16 year old daughter to whom I am mentor, friend, provider, guider, nurturer and comforter. It is a journey with very high highs and heart stopping lows, but all in all it is worth the wear. Thank you for doing this blog to share your perspectives and experiences.
August 5th, 2015 at 6:19 am
Thanks so much. Sounds like we definitely have some things in common. Thanks for the read and the cosign!
January 22nd, 2016 at 11:30 am
Oh my God – this is me! Except I’m starting at the infant stage.
January 22nd, 2016 at 11:37 am
Very cool! 🙂 Good luck!
September 16th, 2016 at 1:46 pm
You’ve written some powerful pieces. Thank you for sharing your world with us. I’ve nominated you for the Liebster award — you can find the post here: http://wp.me/p5WBDp-9ap.
January 16th, 2019 at 3:48 pm
[…] single mom behind Adoptive Black Mom was 40 years old when she adopted her then tween-aged daughter, “Hope.” The blog goes […]
May 12th, 2021 at 10:15 pm
I’d like to contact you soon, once I figure out exactly what it is that’s troubling me. I gave my daughter up for adoption. I continue to question whether or not I made the right decision. My blog is candid & based on my life experiences. So I will also be writing about this once I figure out how to best structure it. Thanks for sharing.