I might add, “You didn’t want to have your ‘own’ kids?”
They don’t know that I very much consider Hope my OWN daughter. They don’t know that I’m not capable of having a biological child. They don’t know a lot of things including how the sting of the comment often hurts so much that I drop a few tears at the first opportunity of being alone.
Somewhere there is a woman: 30, no children. People ask her, “Still no kids?” Her response varies from day to day, but it usually includes forced smiles and restraint.
“Nope, not yet,” she says with a chuckle, muffling her frustration.
“Well, don’t wait forever. That clock is ticking, ya know,” the sage says before departing, happy with herself for imparting such erudite wisdom. The sage leaves. The woman holds her smile. Alone, she cries…
Cries because she’s been pregnant 4 times and miscarried every one. Cries because she started trying for a baby on her wedding night, and that was 5 years ago. Cries because her husband has an ex-wife and she has given him children. Cries because she wants desperately to try in vitro but can’t even afford the deposit. Cries because she’s done in vitro (multiple rounds) and still has no children. Cries because her best friend wouldn’t…
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AdoptiveBlackMom 
April 10th, 2017 at 11:21 pm
I want to give you finger snaps, applause, the church shout and all that after reading this.