September 12, 2014

I Marvel – Part 3

I marvel:

That I still sometimes take her anger personally.
That I haven’t duct taped the door to her room shut when it’s dirty.
When we cycle through dark periods; they always surprise me.
That Hope has embraced a sense of middle class kid entitlement so quickly <side eye>.
At how kind and generous she can be even as she pushes me away.
At how many triggers to rages and shut downs there are.
At how exhausted such episodes make me.
At how my reactions to the rages and shut downs have changed.
At how many times in one day I can say “I don’t know.”
That my reasons for saying “I don’t know “ range from not really knowing to praying the exhausting conversation ends soon.
At how hard single parenting can be.
That I appreciate the lack of need to consult on parental decision making.
That I can’t seem to get to bed before 11pm because I need to wind down a bit after Hope goes to bed.
At how all of a sudden Hope isn’t mad that I signed her up for drama activities during her free periods.
At how she has come to enjoy our church.
At how she is finally interested in going to the church youth group.
At how she wants to volunteer.
At how many food wrappers I recently found under her bed.
At how I still hide my special foods.
At how rough the transition from being a singleton to a single mom is.
At how different this experience is than I imagined.

About AdoptiveBlackMom

I'm a single Black professional woman living in the DC area. I adopted my now adult daughter in 2014, and this blog chronicles my journey. Feel free to contact me at adoptiveblackmom@gmail.com, on Facebook at Adoptive Black Mom, and on Twitter @adoptiveblkmom. ©www.AdoptiveBlackMom.com, 2013-2022. All rights reserved. (Don't copy my ish without credit!) View all posts by AdoptiveBlackMom

This entry was posted on Friday, September 12th, 2014 at 10:04 am and tagged with adoption, Adoption Blogs, Adoption Lessons, Adoption Lessons Learned, Adoption Surprises, African American Adoption, African American Parenting, African American Single Adoptive Mom and posted in Dealing with the Past, Finalization Life, Lessons Learned. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed.

7 responses to “I Marvel – Part 3”

faithcbrown
September 12th, 2014 at 7:04 pm

I hide my special food…in my house if it isnt front and center no one looks for it.

Reply
- AdoptiveBlackMom
  September 12th, 2014 at 7:26 pm
  
  I think this will be a habit until I am an empty nester. I’ve also actually considered buying a mini-fridge for my room. LOL. 🙂
  
  Reply
  - faithcbrown
    September 12th, 2014 at 7:30 pm
    
    That could be convenient for adult beverages 🙂
    
    Reply
Audrey
September 12th, 2014 at 7:07 pm

I don’t know if it is possible, but i would enjoy reading what you thought it was going to be like.

Reply
- AdoptiveBlackMom
  September 12th, 2014 at 7:29 pm
  
  One day I will get around to writing about my early expectations, I guess. Somethings I anticipated; other things, particularly adoption related things…smh even though I knew they would or might happen, they still were shocking.
  
  Reply
puddin85
September 13th, 2014 at 7:46 am

But you’re doing it ♡♥♡♥ Sleep tight, mama

Reply
momto3sugars
September 13th, 2014 at 5:43 pm

Most if not all moms hide their special foods! Ha ha! Lol!!! 🙂

Reply