When I was growing up, I never really thought about new experiences being learning opportunities. I mean, as a teenager, you think you know everything. What could you possibly have to learn? #sarcasm
This weekend was a BFD (big effing deal). Hope went to take her learner’s permit test. We had plans to go first thing in the morning because DMV on a Saturday is a certifiable zoo. Hope wanted to get her hair washed so that her DMV photo would be nice. We had a plan, but the way ADHD-time blindness is set up…we arrived an hour later than planned.
I gently lectured Hope on time management (again). I tried to explain that she needed to find a coping skill that works for her because this kind of thing would eventually affect her outside relationships and jobs that she would eventually have. #blankstare
And then we arrived…
See that figure in the gray sweater and jeans? Yeah, that’s Hope…at the END of the line!
It took 45 minutes to get into the building. It took me 20 minutes to get a parking space. We get in and up to the first counter and she looks to me to manage the interaction.
Internal monologue: “Um, I have my driver’s license; why are you looking at me?”
I remind her of our house rule—you don’t ask (in a voice that can be heard by other humans), you don’t get.
She whispers to the DMV worker that she’s there to take her learner’s permit test. He squawks for her to speak up, so she does. He looks at her documents, gives her a number and a form to fill out. We find seats and she looks to me to complete the form.
Internal monologue: “Um, I have my driver’s license; why do you keep looking at me?”
I encourage her to get a clipboard and a pen. I help her complete the form.
And then we wait and wait and wait. The web page says we have an hour and 7 minutes of wait time just to get to the counter since there are 20+ people ahead of us. When I checked earlier, you know, when we were supposed to have been there, the wait time was 7 minutes. #bitter
I seethe. Honestly I’m throwing a holy fit inside because spending the entire morning at the DMV was not my plan.
I look over at Hope; she sees the ramifications of not keeping to her schedule. It’s clear what happens when you don’t do what you say you’re going to do when you say you’re going to do it.
I pop an Ativan since I am losing my ish on the inside.
By the time we get to the counter to process the paperwork nearly 2 hours have passed, and technically the DMV is closed. It’s takes 15 minutes to get through the paperwork, take the picture and get another number for Hope to take the test.
Remember that Ativan? Yeah, I’m feeling a bit better now, though I could use a nap.
She takes the test. She fails the test.
YOU HAVE GOT TO BE KIDDING ME.
That was like a total of 3 hours of my life I can’t get back and don’t try to repackage that mess as quality time…not when I had to take an Ativan to survive it.
Surprisingly, Hope takes the failure well. She knows the question that was the problem. She knows the right answer and she will pass the next time.
Great. I have complete faith that she will prevail. Me on the other hand…I don’t know. I wish I could outsource this task.
She commented on the way home from the DMV that she will make sure she gets an earlier start next time so that she doesn’t have to wait so long.
Yeah, I’ll believe that when I see it actually happen because honest, hand to God, I cannot believe that my beloved Hope can get herself together to get to the DMV at a time that will not be hazardous to my health if her life depended on it. #realtalk
So stay tuned…Hope might be driving by 2018…maybe.