- I’m a day late. What can I say? It’s been a hella busy week and while I started the draft yesterday (Wednesday), sleep proved more important that blogging. Sue me. LOL.
- Tuesday was my birthday. I worked. I ordered in, and I got a huge same day order from Target. It was a good day. Is it petty that I had to order in for Hope and tell her no she’s couldn’t get a milkshake because it was MY birthday? Yeah, I didn’t think so either.
- I’m feeling so much more stabilized now. I’ve had some reflection time, and while I’m still feeling legit fragile with all that’s going on, I’m realizing that my hormone levels are starting to swing like a trapeze. That’s a problem. I’m still looking to take some time away, but it feels less urgent now. I do need to go get some bloodwork done to see where my “levels” are. This is happening a few years younger than it did for my mom, so I’m like yo, what’s happening here? This aging thing is something.
- I’m spending a lot of time thinking about parenting these days. I continue to learn so much on this journey with Hope. The pandemic changed both of our lives so radically that it still feels like we are trying to figure out how to live together. And even though I know Hope can be a remarkable young woman, she can also be a little devil in PJs. I hereby confess to occasionally allowing her to sleep the whole day away just so I can pretend to be alone. I’m a hardcore extrovert, but everyone needs alone time sometimes. Lately when I retire to my room around 8:30, Hope wants to come with. Um, no thank you. I’m about to do my yoga, sip this wine, read the paper on my phone and turn this light out in an hour. SHHHHHH!
- I’m so frigging over this gotdern pandemic. Put the stupid mask on and stay home. I mean if we could get everything in the universe to sit on our collective asses down for a good 3 weeks, we would have this thing licked, but noooo! I’m really, really over it. And even though I have greatly improved my work from home set up, I’m resentful about having to make space because so many folks won’t stay the eff at home.
- I’m about to make a hiring decision between to candidates. I honest to goddess do not know with of these two candidates I will pick. They are really different, but the same: confident and hungry for career building work experience. I don’t there’s a bad decision to be made here which is an enviable place to be in. Still I have feelings.
- Back to parenting. Anyone else’s kids regularly send them tik toks to watch? Hope sends me the weirdest, darkest, random mess on a regular basis. I don’t bother feigning interest in that ish. I’m guessing she wants to be interesting and stylish, and that she wants more connection. I never complain about the rando videos, but they do make me wonder if this is the stuff she shares, what in the world is she watching the rest of the time??
- Yappy is having serious issues with dreaming at the moment. In the evenings he snores, baby barks and sleep runs. Just once I’d love to peek into his dream and see what he sees. It’s kind of adorable.
- I’m thinking of getting a new coffee maker. I kinda want something fancy even though counter space is at a premium. I just have a regular Mr. Coffee at the moment, but I’m thinking about something more sophisticated since I don’t really get coffee out anymore. Suggestions? I noted that Instapot has a new coffee maker that takes Kcups and Nespresso pods. I like the idea, but it’s not what I had in mind. Hit me with your best coffee maker recommendations.
- At what point does one stop giving their children money to buy the birthday/Christmas/etc gift, while also telling them what to get? Now, admittedly at Christmas, Hope took my request and upgraded it to the amazing bamboo bathtub caddy. She tells me that the waffle iron I requested (and low key paid for) will arrive today, but seriously…how long do we go through these theatrics?
February 3, 2021
Ten Things on Wednesday: 2/3/2021
About AdoptiveBlackMom
AdoptiveBlackMom 
February 4th, 2021 at 6:42 pm
You fund the gifts until she has employment that allows her to do so.
Hormonal swings can start long (yrs) before you fully have steady state hormones; or it can be abrupt and quit cold turkey with no notice. Half your genetic tendency re when to start and stop comes from the paternal side of your genetics AND, frankly, I think our environment is deeply changing when our bodies start and stop hormonal activity. BUT, stay on top of it with doctors because you want to maintain your hormonal levels so you don’t dry up into a desert and lose p.floor tone!!!!
Glad you are starting to find some new balances sometimes. That takes time too. Continue to focus on being good to you. It is key important lesson to model for Hope.
Cheers and joy to you. THANK YOU FOR WRITING!
February 4th, 2021 at 6:57 pm
Yeah, I started peri-menopause a few years ago and every few month, erratically, it’s like there’s a major shift. It’s hard to recognize while it’s happening but when it settles down, it’s easy to see. Definitely checking in with my doc ’cause this swing was horrible.
February 6th, 2021 at 11:16 am
I’m in a great private All-Gender Peri/Menopause group on Facebook, if you’re interested in joining (you should be able to just search for that name). The big rules are no weight talk, and to use gender neutral (not cis-centric) language. As a cis woman who had early menopause due to cancer, I’ve found it to be a super helpful and supportive space. I believe that participants skew pretty white, but the founder is very intentional about sharing resources geared toward people of color.
February 6th, 2021 at 11:43 am
Thanks so much. ❤️
February 4th, 2021 at 7:55 pm
Happy BELATED Birthday!
#3: Progesterone cream has been helping me immensely. That, and every now and then, a melatonin so I can stay asleep.
#7: YES! But my 19-y-o’s are funny.
#10: I’ve never done that, but I did take them to the mall one year (to Bath & Bodyworks) and told both of them to pick out something they thought I’d like. I was pissed that Mother’s Day and they’d done something funky and unforgivable.
February 4th, 2021 at 8:38 pm
Sleep hasn’t really been a problem, but when there’s a big hormone swing I do get the sweats…I stay asleep but wake up drenched. It ain’t cute! Will look into the cream!
February 4th, 2021 at 8:50 pm
Same. I had all of the things in one week 😩
https://agelessandwellness.com/our-pharmacy/
It’s called natural balance cream for women.
February 18th, 2021 at 6:35 am
Happy belated birthday. ❤ Sorry we've been so absent, we do think about you and Hope lots ❤